It Takes A Dynasty

Jeb Bush — why does that always sound redundant — is now focusing on the VA scandal. Should I say the ‘problems’ in the VA he is now seeking to politicize? He’s on the job. Just let Jeb at it.

Of course the one resounding question that comes up to all his campaign promises is does this problem require a dynasty to fix it? According to Jeb’s best rhetoric, it seems to. Only he, he claims, is capable of solving these problems. Only he has the experience. Only he has the pure motives for wanting to fix all these problems. The running joke is if you have a problem, from a leaky roof to needing a baby sitter, just call 1-Jeb-will-fix.

Sort of makes the case for Nanny Government, doesn’t it? It’s as if the only real problem with this Federal Leviathan is it just needs the right Nanny to whip it into shape. Got a cold sore? Call Jeb. Got a bitch, call Jeb. He’s the vaccine.

However, as Mark Steyn has noted, he never does make a case for why only this family is the proper cure for all our ills. What is it about this family that, well, we can’t do without? Why is only he the correct treatment for the disease? And does he have a patent on that medication? He better have. But even based on his exclusive experience, he can’t seem to sell the snake oil. Here, as only Steyn can say it:

I seem to remember someone else four years ago telling us only he was the solution. Before that another mainstream moderate told us the same thing, both of which crashed and burned. (some more than once).

Now more than ever, I am convinced that we have to treat this elitist, establishment medicine as the disease — not the cure. It would be akin to going to the doctor to treat a broken leg and his solution is to break the other one to match. So back to the analytical question of the campaign, why does it take a dynasty to solve the nation’s ills, and only that will work?

Jeb tells us in his new ad, or should I say in his “Right to Rise” pac ads, that “it’s not about yapping!” No, Jeb, it isn’t but why is it about a dynasty? So far Jeb has told us everything except why we need to continue that dynasty.

He also increasingly looks angry in his ads. (should I say their ads?) Jeb is the Irrelevant Candidate” who can only hawk his family heirloom to the crown for the nomination. Onto this narrative of his — which is unavoidable and the only one who cannot face it is Jeb! — we graft the reality of the disease metaphor. We are a nation diseased both culturally and politically by the very medical system they said would cure us. If that makes any sense.

When did medicine become the problem? It’s a bit like those infomercials for drugs that advertise it as the fix but then lists all the numerous and exhaustive side-effects. Well, if you can live with the very real risk of all those side-effects, then this drug might be right for you. Do you dare to try the cure? Once you are on that medication then you must take it because, after all, it is the only one you should take or trust.

In view of that, I would like to change his official campaign theme from ‘Jed can fix it’ to the “Jeb can fart” campaign. Jeb can fart better than any of the establishment rivals. In fact, he can play a whole tune because he is well practiced. Do you prefer a nice little diddy or do you want a full-blown classic like the 1812 Overture, with all the interactive sound effects? He’s the man. Got a problem? “Jeb will fart on it,” like Triumph the dog: “for me to poop on.” Surely, Jeb’s fart campaign could be as well-received as his ‘fix it’ campaign.

RightRing | Bullright

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14 comments on “It Takes A Dynasty

  1. peppermintfarm says:

    LOL! Hilarious article Bull! Take a bow.

    I saw Mark Steyn on Hannity the night he said what he did in the video and I love how he puts things.

    Now let me tell you that Jeb did come down here and not only did he fix things, he built me a whole new house. Yeah! It’s really nice, all kinds of energy saving appliances put in too. I’ve got solar panels on the roof, and a windmill in the yard too.

    I’m so happy he did all of this. He makes for a good workman, but I’m sad to say I still don’t want him for president. He made a number of snafus while the house was being built like forgetting to put insulation in the walls and they had to redo it. Not good.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Bullright says:

      LMAO…. as they say (in disblief) Oh, no he didd_nn’t ! I bet he threw in a generator too, just in case. His team has sure got their hands full in this country. Was Jeb driving the truck? LOL I just hope he didn’t steal anything while he was in there.

      Now that you mention it, in all his ads I didn’t see a guarantee or warranty mentioned. So I guess if you don’t like it, oh well. Not that it ever mattered anyway.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. peppermintfarm says:

    Oh yeah I forgot to mention the generator. Now he did steal my toaster. I think he wanted it to warm himself up for debates and get a kick so he’d look more lively. I guess he doesn’t mind the shock he gets.

    I heard a worker say Jeb likes to put toast in and then grab it out with a knife, then he gets a shock.

    No there were no warrants or guarantees on any of the materials etc.

    Well that’s another story about Jeb driving the truck. He did fall asleep at the wheel one morning and flipped it over. But his family provided him with a new one right away. Like you said “it takes a dynasty”.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Bullright says:

      Hey Pepp, I don’t think that is a shock …. it’s a charge for Jeb. (he usually required 120 volts)

      The solar panels must be lovely, just in time for winter. Well, the ice slides off easier. Sounds like he got you covered …except for the missing insulation. You’ll have that, occasionally. He misses a lot of things — like that whole dynasty thing.

      LMAO flipped the truck. I’m sure it was a well-intentioned accident. Certainly not his fault. Are you sure you didn’t pull the road out from under him? People try to do that I know. “Demolition to dynasty, we do it all.” At least they probably could speak to the farm hands. He’s good at that.

      Liked by 1 person

      • peppermintfarm says:

        Ha, ha yeah a charge for him! Funny.

        Oh yeah with no sun during winter the solar panels are useless. And the windmill is already killing birds. I’m going to tear the damn thing down. Useless shit from Jebbie.

        Yeah Jeb was trying to display he can be a redneck by doing demolition derby tricks. Nobody fell for it. They figured he was some screwball Yankee.

        I’ll tell ya what the farm hands don’t like him either because they all fell asleep while he was “YAPPING”.

        Like

  3. Davetherave says:

    Great article Bull. Sarcasm tore me up!

    He is looking angry isn’t he? Is he taking the Hitlary approach? Billythecigar advising his campaign also? Ya’ know those Bush’s and Clinton’s. Tight club there.

    I don’t even think a shit load of moola can save Jebbie now. And heh that’s fine with me. That phony couldn’t fix ice cubes in an ice tray. He sure in the hell won’t fix anything in Dipshit City.

    Kind of on a side note: Your article about the Bush dynasty got me thinking about the Triple Crown. That got me thinking about American Pharaoh. And damn if that didn’t get me thinking about Barry. Nope, it is time for a lot of new blood…

    Liked by 2 people

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