Kim Jong Un has issues with aggressive “words”

Allow me to paraphrase Kim in proper English vernacular

Those “aggressive words” are causing the trouble. Those voices and words in my ears infuriate me and cause me to kill my own people, build nuclear weapons, send missiles at neighbors for any occasion, threaten the entire region, then test my weapons.

Hell, I even offed my own uncle, and had my stepbrother murdered in a foreign country. I must do these things because of the vicious voices.

Those words and voices are causing me to do all sorts of things like threaten preemptive strikes, invade neighbors, and threaten to use nuclear weapons against the US. Those voices are causing trouble. And the president of the US should stop his aggressive tweets – causing all this trouble.

I, however, am over here peacefully minding my own business building my nuclear bombs and arsenal, testing them; and along come these vicious voices annoying and distracting my legitimate, peaceful operation here.

I’m ready to preemptively bomb those distractors of my agenda.

Well that is a liberal paraphrase of Kim Jong Last-Un’s words. So I slightly embellished on his threats…which is really hard to do.

But then in Kim Jong the last’s view, he is bloody well right.

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